And if David Miscavige Doesn't Like It, He Can Sit on a Tack!

Troublemaker is a disappointment, she gave all the good stuff away for free. So what was left for me? Leah starts off by doing a quick rundown of her crimes, her husband's crimes and some of her mother's. She's trying to cut the CO$ off at the pass before they can discredit her by calling herself out. Meh, I don't give a damn what she did or her husband did or her mother did. Anyone with a brain knows that the CO$ is going start some kind of smear campaign against her for this book and speaking out in general but anyone who's familiar with $cientology will also know that the "crimes" they will allege she committed will either be overly exaggerated or flat out lies. Leah, honey, millions upon millions of people worldwide have been hip to the CO$ and their sneaky and at times possibly, illegal, ways for decades now. Why do you think that the CO$ goes to such great lengths to keep their members from learning the truth about what goes on behind closed doors and why they have such a bad reputation? You were in Sea Org as a young teen, you saw first hand what the real deal was, you even experienced the abuse first hand when Sea Org leader, Mike Curley, threw you overboard. 

I gleefully and greedily ate up her stories of Tommy Girl Cruise behaving like an overgrown toddler throwing fits over cookie dough and chipped mugs. I reveled in picturing Tommy Davis behaving like the bossy little top bitch diva that he is or at least was while he was a high ranking stooge in the CO$. I salivated over Katie writing up Leah up in the church's slam book aka knowledge reports because Leah was a bad guest at her wedding. Katie lucked out that her handlers forgot to update the chip implanted in the back of her head and got out when she did. I almost pissed my pants from joy when Leah tells David Miscavige who in the fuck does Tommy Girl think he is running around embarrassing the church, acting like an SP (suppressive person) and behaving as though he was the head bitch in charge. And finally I had a "fuck yeah" moment when Leah demanded the $300,000 she had to spend at Flag in courses to make amends for her behavior at the TomKat wedding and then telling David and the rest of the church where to shove it. 

I felt the humiliation that you suffered when you were told by your auditor that in order to make the fact that you were having an affair with a married man right by paying for his marriage counseling apologizing to his wife and then having no contact with him. Later when you married him you should have demanded the money you spent on his marriage counseling back. I rolled my eyes and thought "It figures" when Chenbot and that chav Sharon Osbourne joined forces to freeze you and Holly Robinson-Peete out of a job. Fuck those bitches, Julie Chen only has a job because of who she blows and I'm not sure why Sharon always gets a pass. Maybe it's because Sharon is a known psycho and the cowards at CBS don't want dog shit sent to them in the mail. Actually, I hate The Talk like I hate The View. If I want to sit around and hear a bunch of hags bitch about people and things I'll pay attention to my co-workers instead of blocking them out while I'm at work.

Before reading this book I always gave Leah Remini the side eye for being a $cientologist, but now I see her in a different light. I found her sincere in that she believed in her religion and the good works it claims to do, so when she starts seeing it for what it really is,  I didn't roll my eyes when she admits to crying. I admit I don't understand the disappointment and hurt that she felt when it all went down but I believe her pain was real. Hell, I even like her now.

Leah is honest and I'm sure was very restrained in what she could have shared. I think she laid out the bare minimum to get her story out there, while that's admirable and all, I wanted more. I wanted embarrassing stories about Kirstie Alley, John Travolta and Jenna Elfman (all of whom I hate with a vengeance) even stories about third tier celebrities like the Masterson family would have had made me happy. Maybe next time Leah, maybe next time. 

Is that a thetan in your pocket or are you just happy to see that picture of LRH?

For years now we've been hearing horror stories from high ranking and no ranking defectors of Scientology and they all match up. The church can call them liars all they want, but I believe every single word. Most of what you read in Jenna Miscavige Hill's book will not surprise you, it's not like you haven't heard the stories of slave labor, physical and psychological abuse, the poor living conditions and of the forced disconnects with family and friends. What did surprise me was that angry midget leader David Miscavige's own niece wasn't treated any better than her fellow cult members, but then neither were her parents. You'd think that the man at the top would be desperate for his whole family to be so into Scientology that he would have had them all treated like royalty. A united family front would have worked in his favor and had given the public the illusion that he was actually loved. I guess when you're that power hungry and a narcissistic asshole to boot the only things that matter to you are how high you can get your lifts before it looks like you're wearing lifts and who your OT Clear BFF Tom Cruise is dating. Oh and I forgot to mention how much money your "church" is bleeding its members dry of to continue to support your lavish lifestyle. 

At an early age Jenna was thrown to the wolves at a desert hell hole called The Ranch. The Ranch was a place that Sea Org members with children stowed their children away like so much old luggage. While the adults were away at their slave labor posts, their children were providing free labor to renovate and beautify the ranch. In exchange for room and board they were expected to sign a billion year contract for their services, continue their slave labor, received little to no education, were yelled at and humiliated in front of others and given meager meals. 

As the years passed Jenna would lose her family, not that this made much of an impact because technically she had lost them several years before, be punished and humiliated several times. Most of the punishments she would receive would be over stupid things like being friends with kitchen workers and liking a boy who wasn't in the same program as her. Her parents eventually left the "church" but she wanted to stay behind. As shocking as that decision to make was, it made sense at the time. All she knew was what her parents had forced onto her and she wasn't educated enough for public school and knew she would be labeled stupid and odd. That decision worked in her favor as she met her husband and had two children with him. If they would have stayed in Sea Org not only would they have been separated for years on end but having children would have been forbidden. 

Thankfully Jenna got out, it was difficult but she and her husband made it. Now she's helping other ex members of the church rebuild their lives and she helps run a website devoted to sharing the bad word on Scientology and all that it does not stand for. 

Bonus, here's an old commercial for Dianetics, the bullshit guide to life that conman extordinaire L. Ron Hubbard built his church of fear and lies on.