Gift idea #1: This is the last minute gift that proves you don't have any fucks left to give when it comes to Christmas and the people you don't like but still have to buy something for. A $1 scratch and win lottery ticket, a Slim Jim and a can of cheap beer. Keep your fingers cross that karma doesn't bite you in the ass by making the ticket a winner, even a win of $1 is unacceptable.
Merry fucking Christmas to all and if any little children stumble upon this... Santa Claus isn't real. It's your mom and dad, they've been lying to you for all of these years. What other lies have they been telling you?
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